Rev. Mitch McTurtle the Butt Pirate™️ 🐢

Twas the Rev. Salty Mitch, who dropped anchor by a great hill, climbed up the rigging of the earth, and gathered a crew of pirates. He laid down the Articles of the Dark Armada —the ultimate pirate code for how to sail the choppy waters of life under the Armada flag. #DarkArmada

Stephen Miller is the post-nasal drip hork-lugee spat upon a sidewalk.

Ken Paxton doesn’t give reach-arounds and he sharts on women for fun.

Join my first spaces for unfiltered fun.

Ukraine will beat Russia.

Schmitt: Are you in fact, a Republican representing CA’s 54th district & co-sponsor of Poe’s Law? Smith: No, in fact, that would be Rep. Jack Kimble. @RepJackKimble

The Sermon on the Hook Piratical honour demands that ye wear yer scars and stripes with pride, for a pirate is not defined by his riches but by the grim, dark reasons that led him to the waves. #DarkArmada

The Sermon of the Hook. Piratical honour demands that ye wear yer scars and stripes with pride, for a pirate is not defined by their riches but by the grim, dark reasons that led them to the waves. #DARKArmada

Hey @grok what does my “X report card”

#DarkArmada We captain our own ships and don’t enable the bad actors.

@ElleBeeDub2 Found Mitch out cruising with his friend Frank. #smokefleet

Rehab is going well for not having broken bones or cardiac arrest. I’m busy working on senate bills as you can see. #smokefleet #blueduckarmy #NAFO #anonymous

Still here bitches!! #smokefleet #NAFO #Anonymous #blueduckarmy

I spoke with Mitch McConnell this morning he is doing well saving ducks and eating algae from the reflecting pool. #smokefleet #NAFO #blueduckarmy