Translate Things (@TranslateThings) header
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Translate Things

@TranslateThings

the internet is a scary place, let me translate things for you

 United States
Joined January 2017
  • Tweets5.8K
  • Following793
  • Followers101K
BREAKING: Donald Trump's personal library was destroyed in the FBI raid of Mar-a-Lago. Both books are sadly beyond repair, and he hadn't even finished coloring one in yet.
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Translate Things (@TranslateThings) profile picture
Translate Things@TranslateThingsMay 15
It's funny how you never see a woman in the passenger seat of a cybertruck.
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Philly Tumble (@PhillyTumble) profile picture
Philly Tumble@PhillyTumbleNov 4
Replying to @SatireAP
The Democrats' very first bill should be the $5000 thing, send it to Trump's desk. Make him veto it.
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The worst people you went to high school with are all having a bad night tonight.
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M1das (@M1das_OW2) profile picture
M1das
@M1das_OW2Nov 4
ITS CALLED TWITTER NOW
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We got a blue Texas before GTA6
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Sure seems like Trump's tactic of repeatedly complimenting male candidates' asses wasn't an effective electoral strategy.
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I've seen enough. It's a #Bluenami
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Not even half a Scaramucci
TMZ (@TMZ) profile pictureTMZ
@TMZOct 16
🚨 BREAKING: Katie Zacharia has been fired as the White House press secretary tmz.com/2026/10/16/katie-zac…
Katie Zacharia Fired as White House Press Secretary

Katie Zacharia Fired as White House Press Secretary

Katie Zacharia's White House career is apparently over before it even got started ... with President Trump's newest press secretary reportedly getting the boot after a week on the job.

tmz.com
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Instead of the acronym HOMES to remember the Great Lakes we now need to change it to suit Trump's actions. SHAME fits nicely.
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Farewell, Lady G. Say hi to Mitch for us.
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Translate Things (@TranslateThings) profile picture
Translate Things@TranslateThingsJun 16
Replying to @InternetNewsAg2
MAGA cope is wild...and sad. Throw them both in jail if they're both guilty. See how easy that is???
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The Deflecting Pool...
Image from Translate Things (@TranslateThings)
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Predator vs. Alien
Image from Translate Things (@TranslateThings)
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It's funny how you never see a woman in the passenger seat of a cybertruck.
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FUN FACT: If you study the History of Ancient Egypt at university, the only job prospect you have is teaching others the History of Ancient Egypt. It's the original pyramid scheme.
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Apparently Chuck Norris died like 20 years ago. Death was just too scared to tell him until today.
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Aww man, the FIFA Peace Prize used to really mean something
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Hey, @NRA, The US Government just executed a citizen and then publicly stated that they had to kill him in order to infringe on his inalienable right to carry his permitted firearm. When should I expect a well regulated militia? How about a tweet? Your silence is deafening.
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Dear MAGA, It isn't too late to admit you put your faith in the wrong man. To publicly reverse your support and tell the world that you voted Trump but didn't vote for THIS. Because the only other possibility is that you DID vote for exactly this. And... well, that's fucked up.
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Things Trump Voters Gave Away: - The Bill of Rights - Public Trust in Elections - Truth & Independence in Media - The Integrity of the Judiciary - The Expectation of Personal Safety - America's Place in the Global Order - Their Own Dignity Things Trump Voters Got: - A Red Hat
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