Okong' Okuna

Welbeck's longevity is a marvel. Dude has been in premier league forever.

"And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world." - Desiderata.

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Unfortunately, the problem with early brilliance is that it overrates potential. What could be becomes a permanent substitute for what needs doing and by the time you wake up, you have nothing tangible to refer to for your brilliance but fantasies. Potential means nothing, in the end, if it does not translate to utility. The world forgets everyone, but it forgets the one that serves it less quicker. How useful is your intelligence? What did you do with it? Problem with most intelligent people, however, is that the more irrelevant they become, the deeper they wallow in their indignation. They feel they are owed success by life merely for existing. And they use their stagnation to lay claim to superiority. They say things like you have to be stupid to win. Intelligent people suffer. It excuses them from trying. From investing in uncertainties and imperfections of life, which is an indispensable ingredient for success. Until their courage completely atrophies and all they are left with is bitterness at a life they could have lived but never did. A life everyone else is living, even those he considers inferior to himself. And this is what we call the paralysis of analysis. You become so accustomed to observing life, dissecting its contradictions and anticipating its disappointments that you lose the appetite to participate in it. You start believing that your intelligence excuses you from the sordid labors of existence. You refuse to get dirty. In the end, you build nothing. This is, by the way, at the core of Dostoevsky's "Notes from Underground". Read the book if you find time. The narrator is an intelligent man whose suffers a similar fate.

When N (White gf) & I were planning our life together in Australia, I wanted to assure her of my commitment to her welfare so I told her she wouldn't need to worry about the bills; I'd get a job, any job, as I upgraded my education just to take care of her. She got so upset. Went quiet for about 3 days. I didn't undersand it. Why are you getting mad at a man for wanting to take care of you? She came back 3 days later, said I sounded controlling. Said she's been taking care of herself just fine & she'd obviously be making way more between us so it would be more prudent if I focused all my energies on upskilling & upgrading my education in the initial years of my stay there. She didn't understand why I was insisting on paying bills for her. It's what made her upset. I very quickly apologized. Said it's my culture. This is what men do. Men provide. Madam almost cursed me. Said she didn't want that nonsense. We needed to be logical. She said, 1st year could be for Masters while I learn another skill like plumbing/electricity. Then after certification, I could do minimum part-time as I looked after our baby, while still sitting my postgraduate. She'd have us - our kid & I - on a weekly allowance. Then maybe in 2-3 years, when I'm on my feet, I can start contributing to the bills. "Just common sense," she reiterated. I apologized again profusely. Said, I meant well. That's when I realized that we have normalized a lot of nonsense in African marriages. And sorry for Nigerians, but a lot of Kenyan families do this abroad too. Especially, nurses and international teachers. Carry their husbands with them, pay bills as husband looks after kid and upgrades. But the problem with men too, I have observed, is that instead of fully investing in upskilling and looking after kids, they use that time to chat up & look for other girlriends back home. A very unserious lot. All in all, if marriage is to work in this era, we all need to invest materially and emotionally in it. The one with more, gives more. Until thebother has more, then gives more. Marriage is a dance. It'll never be 50-50. Just dance to your tune, your very subjective circumstances.

One common feature of classic novels, and the Victorian age, was folks inheriting fortunes from obscure relatives. Notes From The Underground, Nicholas Nickleby, Portrait of a Lady: list is endless. What happened to that? Uncles & aunts don't give inheritance anymore, They are losing the recipe. What's up with that?

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The problem with having long hair as an African adult man, in Africa, is that you either pass for a "crazy" prof if you alight from a car or an actual madman/thief if you are on foot. Both are dangerous, because as a prof, they always expect you to say something intelligent and some coins, when you are just a shopkeeper trying to restock salt; as a thief you are a yawn away from lynching because it will be mistaken for attempted snatching. People complain about balding but balding is safer. Everyone just assumes it's the weight of responsibility doing you in. For every 10 thieves lynched, only 2 are bald. Police come to a crowd of people, guess who they arrest? Bus conductors at the bus stage, guess who they shove? Go to any AGM, its the guy with one strand of hair speaking on behalf of his company. The hairy ones? Ushers. All of them. Something to be concealed. Decide to put on a wee cap, make it less bushy, they'll call it midlife crisis. Balding is better.

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Yes, that same one from Azam. Clears almost all of the Kenyan brands tbh, for less. Kwanza, they have a Chungwa Embe flavor that's harder to find, even in Arusha/Namanga if you are looking to import. As close to organic as it gets.

"Same debt issues, the same wealth and values gap issues, the same international geopolitical issues, the same climate issues, and the same technology issues... Midterm elections will just change who will be dealing with these issues and how." - Compelling critique by Dalio👇🏾

If Bellingham was in Barca, he'd be getting Ballon shouts. Madrid has always had more individual brilliance, so individual brilliance seems less remarkable. It's easier to shine as an individual where the rest of the team is mediocre. When everyone is good, you're just another one. Just another day.

They were very strict and thorough this time round. Even had portable weighbridges along some routes like the Kericho-Kaplong one. Probably an operation.

A KSh 100,000 (~$770) bathing soap. Even the devil does not have this many sins to wash away.

Try a woman who gets lost in the wonders of her mind and smiles into the void. You won't look back.

Folks said Think Twice is cheap, I went into one and shoes were going for 5-7K. A beaten Mendl that I get for about 2.5K at Budget Wear, and 1K in Gikomba, was selling at 4K. Now, I am thinking twice.

You go into hoods like Kibera and find amazing soaps that never make it to supermaket aisles, a suit dry cleaning service charging 200 per suit, and an Embe juice from Tanzania. It's a whole other economy outside the mainstream one.

Another thing I have an issue with in Nairobi, is Truth and Dare in house parties. We are adults ffs! How about UNO? UNO is nice. Hide and seek? Now that's exciting. But nooo, Pamela wants to know if I have ever eaten god-knows-what. It's the only truth that matters. World War III on the horizon but "have you ever had a threesome" just can't wait. And no, I don't want to kiss Daphne. If I wanted Daphne, I would have told her ages ago. Daphne plays boxing. She scares me. And no amount of daring will make me kiss her. You can dare me all you want. And I know you say you want the truth, but you don't want it, Paul. You don't want this truth, you can't handle the truth. Hell, even I don't want this truth and it's mine. You think it's dieting that keeps me thin? You think I was born like this? You don't want the truth. So can we just play other games, man? E.g. monopoly. Now that's something. You learn to invest. What does my sixsome in campus twenty years ago help you with? Let's get a little serious.

I was invited to some traditional ceremony recently by a few buddies, but when I got there they said the chicken parts I was eyeing were for family men. It's fine. I'm not mad. It's their culture. But the next time they need an emergency baby sitter, or a place to sleep when their wives are on a rampage, it better be family men they reach out to. My culture prohibits it. People I gave fish heads and chicken thighs in my house telling me a wee gizard requires a trainload of children. Every meal in my house is a traditional ceremony henceforth. Better eat at home, the moon is at angle theta, we are fasting. Drink water. Just culture.