Will King

Long answer but I have 9 kids and 1 more kids on the way, so I am always thinking about this subject. Honestly I don’t really enjoy the job of parenting. I would say about 80% of the time I would rather be doing something else. But I love my kids. I love that they exist. Kids can completely change you. They can make your life richer and force you to grow up in ways you didn’t realize you needed. But that’s still talking about what they do for you. The bigger thing is that a whole other person gets to exist. Someone who can fall in love, make something beautiful, become somebody’s best friend, and do good you’ll never even know about. You bring them into the world for their sake. That’s what loving someone means. You want good things for them because they’re them. The benefit doesn’t have to come back to you. "To will the good of the other for the sake of the other and not for the sake of myself." — Aquinas There will be suffering. Some of it will be brutal. But there can also be a thousand transcendent moments that make being alive amazing. I get to love them. They get a whole lifetime to love other people. That love can keep multiplying through lives I’ll never know about. Some of it will happen long after I’m gone. It’ll still matter just as much if we have a sound teleology. I can’t think of anything greater than bringing someone into the world and helping them put more love into it. If enjoyment becomes the test of whether having kids is worthwhile we’re already talking about a person like they’re a product or something that exists for my benefit and needs to deliver a satisfying experience. My kids’ lives don’t have to justify themselves by making mine experience of parenting them enjoyable. They matter for their own sake.